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I can clearly remember one night when I was big pregnant with Blaire and realized too late that we were out of tortillas. I figured I would just make some quickly. When I started this project I was alone in the kitchen. About a minute and a half into it I had been discovered. Four chairs into the kitchen, four children anxiously awaiting a chance to help. I remember Titus actually bumping into the back of my legs with his chair and very politely saying, "Excuse me, Mama! 'Scuse me!" Then came the real action: Titus wildly dusting flour on the tortilla I was rolling, someone cracking into the drawer and passing out rolling pins. Everyone rolling, and dusting, and rolling, and wadding the dough back up and having a grand old time too. I looked out of the haze of flour and elbows feeling very ready to blow the whistle, and I saw my husband smiling at me and laughing. He nodded at me and said, "It's okay." I knew what he meant. Fat souls are better than clean floors. They were so delighted to be in the thick of it -- dinner was late, I could have slept standing up, and we were doing exactly the right thing -- throwing flour around the kitchen. And it was okay. I don't even remember cleaning it up (quite likely because I was asleep on the couch while Luke did it all!). Most of the time the children do not know that what they are doing is overwhelming.
- p. 52-53, Loving the Little Years by Rachel Jankovic (italics original)
There are times when we do need to pull our kids and tell them what are acceptable or suitable behaviours and what are not. But I am far more often tempted to be driven by my preferred lifestyle to shape their behaviours, forgetting that I must nurture their souls and connect with their hearts first. Fat souls are better than clean floors.
I am still reading this book through, but I highly recommend it to any parents, especially those who have or want to have more than 2 children. Try Booko to find the book.